It is within this hour that I now give you my bedtime confessionals:
While having my evening shower, I write on the shower door my thoughts for the day. I’ve done this forever, only now, it’s about my children and my life as opposed to signing my name with my boyfriend’s last name to
follow. Now I doodle hearts, or write how much I love my kids. It’s like my own condensational mood board. If I am having a bad day, it’s all over that door. I know it’s silly, but for some odd reason it makes me happy. I love that it disappears in moments like I am sending off the bad day vibes.
My husband and I have mini date nights in our room watching “Top Chef” or “Kitchen Nightmares.” These are two of the only shows we both watch in bed without falling asleep. I can say they are not my favorite, but he loves them so I do my best to be on board. It feels like a little date because we
allow ourselves some witty banter over the show and the bonus is that it’s during the week so it gives us an option to check in with each other which is so hard to do with two little ones.
I sip green tea while looking at my favorite reality TV star’s Instagram’s. This satisfies my need for when voyeurism meets gossip. It’s replaced the evening phone calls I used to have time for with my besties. I can check into their lives and either laugh at their oddities or feel some kind of relation to their struggles. I can pass judgments secretly and isn’t that just every woman’s dream? #quietlyjudgemental
I track my moods for the day. Ok I know this sounds weird, but I can’t tell you how much it has helped. I am someone who believed that for the most part I was sad or felt depressed at some point every day. It was really getting me down, so I decided I was going to make a conscious effort to not feel that way. The only way I could figure this out, was to see really how I was feeling every single day. So I took to my smart phone for assistance and started using two different apps. The first one is called “Moody Me,"http://sghealthyapps.challengepost.com/. There are many options to choose from: depression, anger, sadness, happy, joyful, worry, overwhelmed, etc… and with the help of this app
you can graph everything to see your distribution between moods. One interesting development I uncovered was that I am surprisingly a lot happier than I thought I was. I track almost every day feeling either “Ok,” or “good.”
The other app I decided to use is, T2 Mood Tracker, http://www.t2.health.mil/apps/t2-mood-tracker,. The main focus of this tracker is to track my patience every day since that has always been an area of struggle for me. But there are many areas that can be tracked, such as anxiety, depression, general well-being, stress, etc… but you can also add a “custom rating category” So I did… I started
with just simply tracking my patience on a scale every day. Did I have total and complete patience with my child all day? Did I show some patience but not total patience? Or was the day all thrown right to crap with absolutely no patience at all….and I could rate this on a scale and then I could GRAPH it and magic! Poof! You could see every day the ups and downs to your patience. Now since I
am a visual person, to see the up and down was pretty eye opening….but I didn’t stop there, I decided to track my arguments with my husband, my name calling (another area that desperately needed work) and I tracked how tired I was. What a coincidence? The more tired I was more the at risk I was to lose my patience. For some this may not work,but for me, it was like a challenge
and I set out every single day to keep my trackers as positive as possible and having that visual really drives the point home.
And finally, I watch my shows, (reality or not) and find total calm and peace before my 8 month old wakes up to be fed and cuddled once, then twice and then it’s time to start the day that then leads to the confessionals all over again.